It’s December. My boyfriend and I had just spent two months living together, and we’d agreed that we wanted to close the distance after since the two months had been so successful. And we wanted to do it sooner rather than later.

So when I started researching visas, I was quickly disappointed by the lack of choices. My boyfriend and I wanted to live together and be a normal couple. Sure, we wanted to get married and live happily ever after, but we wanted to do it on our terms, with time spent together in normal couplehood first.

Permanent residency visas/work visas were expensive, and many took a long time to be approved. Others were too short – I didn’t want to spend only 3 months together only to leave again. Personally, I didn’t want to do a fiancée visa, or get married just so we could be together. Maybe it’s because of my divorce, but I didn’t feel it was fair that we had to either be married or live an ocean away, which sometimes feels like the only options a country will give you.

However, that is not the case! There are a few types of temporary visas which can give the time to have your cake and eat it, too. Some examples include long-term visitor visas (many countries have 6-12 month long visitor visas), working holiday visas, even some student visas can give you the time to be with your long-distance love while exploring their culture.

I realized that although these have different requirements I had to meet, I could do them on my own terms and free myself up for a chance to see how we handled life together on a longer term basis before stressing over the incredibly detailed things needed for a fiancée or partner visa.

I chose to come on a working holiday visa to Australia. It gives me a year to live, work, and explore the country, and it wasn’t dependent on anyone else for my entry. It gives us time to live together as a couple, and it means I can apply at the end to be a permanent resident without being married or the pressure of getting married. It gave us a few more hoops to jump through, but these were acceptable to us for a chance to live together for a year and see how things worked.

I realize this doesn’t work the same way for other people in other countries, but my point here is this: if you want to do it a different way, don’t give up. You may have to be willing to make some compromises, but closing the distance without getting married can be done.

Marisol Dunham has been a freelance writer since 2007, and now lives with her once long-distance boyfriend in Australia. An American wandering the bush, she writes about her life and writing ventures on her blog at http://www.madunham.com/. You can find her on Twitter at @maridunham.

When I first started looking at visas to close the distance, I quickly became overwhelmed. Not only were my options quite limited, but it felt like everything had a high level of requirements that I wasn’t sure if I’d be able to make. Everything requires a different level of proof, and let’s face it – reading government paperwork is as much fun as a root canal.

After spending quite a bit of time reviewing the information, I came up with a pros and cons list for people trying to figure out their best option.

Prospective Marriage Visa – Subclass 300

Pros:

-Requires only evidence of a relationship and intended marriage.

-Allows some time to live together before getting married.

-Easier to be approved than the partner visa, especially for people who can’t meet the 12 month de facto relationship status (as in, you must have lived together for a minimum of 12 months)

Cons:

-You still have to apply for the Partner visa (Subclass 309) after you get married.

-The visa is only for 9 months, and the nine months starts the day it’s approved.

-Wanting to live together without the pressure of a wedding isn’t possible, as proof of a planned wedding must be shown.

-Planning a wedding a country away is no picnic.

-Must lodge application while outside Australia, and be outside of Australia when the visa is approved.

Partner Visa (provisional) – Subclass 309

Before we begin, here’s a simplified explanation on the 12 month requirement. To apply for this visa, there’s a requirement to have lived together for 12 consecutive months.

There’s only a few ways to waive this, but the two most common ways are to either be married (and even then, less than 6 months of living together is frowned upon) OR to register the relationship in a state that allows relationship registration.

Pros:

-Immediate permanent residency status once this is visa is approved.

-Can be lodged inside or outside of Australia (although you must be still either in or out when it’s approved).

-Do not have to be married or engaged to have this visa.

Cons:

-Requires a large amount of proof upfront as compared to the Prospective Marriage Visa.

-That pesky 12 months living together requirement.

-If you don’t live in a state that does relationship registration and don’t want to get married, getting the 12 months required together is a huge pain.

-Paying for this visa straight from most visas (aka not after the PMV) is a big upfront cost – $2575 AUD as of 2011. See this page here for a current price list.

Tips:

-Read the Partner Migration booklet. Read it back to front. Don’t get frustrated – research and take some notes as if it were a project.

-Don’t expect to get everything right away. Give yourself time to think and digest all of the information in the booklet.

-Every situation is unique, and many people have special circumstances that need to be taken into consideration. Don’t be afraid to dig for answers to those questions.

-Australiaforum.com has an active visa/immigration forum where you can ask individual questions or search around if needed.

Marisol Dunham has been a freelance writer since 2007, and now lives with her once long-distance boyfriend in Australia. An American wandering the bush, she writes about her life and writing ventures on her blog at http://www.madunham.com/. You can find her on Twitter at @maridunham.